Compersion — a warm feeling of joy and satisfaction from the fact that your partner is happy with someone else.
What it means
Compersion is often called the opposite of jealousy. The term is especially common in polyamorous circles, but the feeling itself is familiar to people in monogamous relationships too — for example, when we are sincerely glad about a loved one’s successes or joy. It is important to understand that compersion does not cancel out other emotions. Joy for a partner and a slight anxiety or vulnerability can coexist, and that is completely normal. Compersion is not a mandatory “norm” or a measure of “correct” polyamory — you do not need to force it out of yourself. For many people it comes gradually, as trust grows and confidence in one’s own value to a partner deepens.
Example
Igor notices that his partner is glowing after a date with someone else, and catches himself in a pleasant feeling — he feels good because she feels good. At the same time, he calmly admits that he sometimes feels worry too, and is learning to talk about it out loud.
Related terms
Polyamory, Metamour, Ethical non-monogamy
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